Things i'd like to say to my 16 yr old self...........
-You are beautiful.....VERY BEAUTIFUL
-Miss talented/ beautiful/ popular is not going to have a better life than you
-Not having a boyfriend is OK, that doesn't make u any less beautiful
-Being fat is not a sin, its OK
-All the girls that wear trendier, smarter clothes are NOT smarter than you.
-You can wear what you like, people won't laugh. You can wear a jeans even if u don't have waist 28"
-Don't get so embarassed of the pimples, even they make u look beautiful
-Hanging out with smart-ass people is not necessary to get noticed around the campus.
-People are liars, don't believe everything everyone says
-you will have a nice husband and No! ur parents won't marry you off to a jerk at 18
-Wait for 10 years and then name your best friend from college life
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
I cracked up
The previous posts are almost too good to be real. Only for so long, the picture has changed lately.
Yesterday was the tantrum day - not her's ....Mine.
Lot of things went wrong.
1. She wanted to play color cards game, we had already done it once. No use telling her we'll return to it tomorrow. She kept shoving the cards to my face. And my patience vanished, i shouted at her, pushed her away, threatened to tear the cards off. I know, i feel like crap. Was almost cruel.
To top it off, i did tear those cards and trash them. The motive was to let her know, i do what i say. I am not a pushover....big ego at play?
(Why make threats at all? Empty or otherwise.)
2. This whole card issue ended on a wrong foot and paved way for another tantrum.
She wanted to go to Baby's house NOW....I kept telling her, i have to cook, daddy will be home soon, baby might be sleeping....to no avail. And then i finally gave in, and dropped her off at the baby's. I told her to stay there, not to come back home, for dinner or for the night.
Later, when hubby came home, he called her up and asked if he can pick her. She said, mommy told me not to come home. How can i come?
He convinced her, got her back. I was in tears, hated myself for everything. She came back, we had a tearful reunion. All was forgotten.
I lay in my bed awake and thought about the day.
reached following conclusions- Am repeating these to myself often
1. Absolutely no raised voice....A BIG NO
2. No threats.
3. She comes first, and then TV/ internet/ books. If she wants my attention, she gets it.
4. If she wants to visit the baby, let her. Don't manipulate.
As i am writing this, she is already there. Same thing today morning, i was cooking, told her would drop her after i am done cooking and she has had lunch. No, the cooking can wait, Drop me there NOW.
Took a deep breath, put off the gas, dressed her up, put on the jacket and dropped her there.
Am worried that she has not eaten. But, will let her feel that she is hungry. Why shove food in their mouths even before they feel the hunger, the growling stomach...the food will get tastier when that happens.
Yesterday was the tantrum day - not her's ....Mine.
Lot of things went wrong.
1. She wanted to play color cards game, we had already done it once. No use telling her we'll return to it tomorrow. She kept shoving the cards to my face. And my patience vanished, i shouted at her, pushed her away, threatened to tear the cards off. I know, i feel like crap. Was almost cruel.
To top it off, i did tear those cards and trash them. The motive was to let her know, i do what i say. I am not a pushover....big ego at play?
(Why make threats at all? Empty or otherwise.)
2. This whole card issue ended on a wrong foot and paved way for another tantrum.
She wanted to go to Baby's house NOW....I kept telling her, i have to cook, daddy will be home soon, baby might be sleeping....to no avail. And then i finally gave in, and dropped her off at the baby's. I told her to stay there, not to come back home, for dinner or for the night.
Later, when hubby came home, he called her up and asked if he can pick her. She said, mommy told me not to come home. How can i come?
He convinced her, got her back. I was in tears, hated myself for everything. She came back, we had a tearful reunion. All was forgotten.
I lay in my bed awake and thought about the day.
reached following conclusions- Am repeating these to myself often
1. Absolutely no raised voice....A BIG NO
2. No threats.
3. She comes first, and then TV/ internet/ books. If she wants my attention, she gets it.
4. If she wants to visit the baby, let her. Don't manipulate.
As i am writing this, she is already there. Same thing today morning, i was cooking, told her would drop her after i am done cooking and she has had lunch. No, the cooking can wait, Drop me there NOW.
Took a deep breath, put off the gas, dressed her up, put on the jacket and dropped her there.
Am worried that she has not eaten. But, will let her feel that she is hungry. Why shove food in their mouths even before they feel the hunger, the growling stomach...the food will get tastier when that happens.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Homeschool day 2-3-4
I know....3 days in one post.
So far so good. That activity book was real fun. She would actually look forward to the "teaching time".
We are done with the first book. Other activities it had were
1. telling the time. For now, i just introduced her to the short-hand and long-hand. The short-hand points towards a number, read that number and tell the time. The minute hand is really complicated. I have put it aside for now. The problem with our clock is, it has only 12, 3, 6 and 9 as numbers. Rest are just dashes. We need to get a new clock, or exchange it with the neighbour. :)
2. Sorting - pictures of clothes, sort them - socks, shirts, pants etc.
3. Match the columns, numbers on one side and objects on the other. Match 1 with one object, 2 with two and so on.
4. writing numbers...tracing them along the dotted line. Man, she can write, I never taught her to....i never taught even her lowercase/uppercase. She can write both, most letters. She has a good grip of the pencil. I think its safe to move to writing. On day 1, i was trying not to include "writing", but after gauging her level, i think its safe.
5. Her favourite one was. there were cards - different colors. I asked her to pick a card, see what a color it is, and try and find all objects of that color around the house. She simply loved this one. We are doing this again tomorrow.
we did the much promised clean-up on day 2. My kitchen pantry looks sparkling clean. I had her help me sort- trash, recycle, keep. We put all plastic bags together and took them to safeway in the eveing for recycling. We threw all the empty coffee bottles/ ghee dabbas and so on. No, i won't need them to store anything. :)
Day 3 we cleaned up the patio, thats an ongoing weekly activity for at least a month more. We talked about Fall while we cleaned. She made an observation- all the fallen leaves are brown, red, yellow or black. None are green. bravo...I showed her the leaves ON the trees were still green, many were turning red, and they would come down soon. the green ones will all turn red and fall off, until the tree is bare.
We plan a weekly observation of the leaves.
Have tried to give a good enough account of 4 days.
Will keep posting.
So far so good. That activity book was real fun. She would actually look forward to the "teaching time".
We are done with the first book. Other activities it had were
1. telling the time. For now, i just introduced her to the short-hand and long-hand. The short-hand points towards a number, read that number and tell the time. The minute hand is really complicated. I have put it aside for now. The problem with our clock is, it has only 12, 3, 6 and 9 as numbers. Rest are just dashes. We need to get a new clock, or exchange it with the neighbour. :)
2. Sorting - pictures of clothes, sort them - socks, shirts, pants etc.
3. Match the columns, numbers on one side and objects on the other. Match 1 with one object, 2 with two and so on.
4. writing numbers...tracing them along the dotted line. Man, she can write, I never taught her to....i never taught even her lowercase/uppercase. She can write both, most letters. She has a good grip of the pencil. I think its safe to move to writing. On day 1, i was trying not to include "writing", but after gauging her level, i think its safe.
5. Her favourite one was. there were cards - different colors. I asked her to pick a card, see what a color it is, and try and find all objects of that color around the house. She simply loved this one. We are doing this again tomorrow.
we did the much promised clean-up on day 2. My kitchen pantry looks sparkling clean. I had her help me sort- trash, recycle, keep. We put all plastic bags together and took them to safeway in the eveing for recycling. We threw all the empty coffee bottles/ ghee dabbas and so on. No, i won't need them to store anything. :)
Day 3 we cleaned up the patio, thats an ongoing weekly activity for at least a month more. We talked about Fall while we cleaned. She made an observation- all the fallen leaves are brown, red, yellow or black. None are green. bravo...I showed her the leaves ON the trees were still green, many were turning red, and they would come down soon. the green ones will all turn red and fall off, until the tree is bare.
We plan a weekly observation of the leaves.
Have tried to give a good enough account of 4 days.
Will keep posting.
Monday, November 17, 2008
homeschool- day 1
Went well.
We made some stuff with clay in the morning. I made an awful butterfly. She made a bird. I tried to see the bird in what she made, and did. Congratulated her for the effort.
Post lunch, we took a nap.
Then we looked for some information about "lake tahoe" on the net. Have plans of driving there this thanksgiving. Its a difficult terrain, snow can make it more so. We saw videos about snow chains, how to fix them on your car tires. She wanted to see video of how to make a snowman :) Saw those too. Quite educational- for both of us.
I have a chart for her, where we change the date/ weather/ season etc. We went out and checked the weather. Came back and finished the chart. Weather- Sunny, Season- Fall. month- Nov and so on.
Later, i had her do some stuff from a Pre-k workbook. Some of it was-
1. Find triangles in the picture and mark them
2. What comes first - eg. 3 pictures - a child opening an icecream, eating it, and dropping it.
3. connect the dots
4. 4 pictures in a row- find 2 objects that rhyme
5. Cut out shapes from the book and trace them on a paper. Color them.
6. Coloring page - i let her color out of the borders :)
Boy! Did she breeze through the assignments. I gave her a star sticker for each assignment when we were done. Stickers saying- Well done, great job, etc
And then she says, You are a good teacher...i guess kids think their moms know nothing. :) She was surprised that i can connect the dots/ know rhyming words.
We had planned on cleaning-up session as i wrote in the previous post. never got around to it. After our "assignments", we took out the trash, and visited the neighbour who has a baby. An hour flew by. Cleaning up is postponed.
Things i learnt:
1. Little patience goes a long way
2. She is too fast, i am soon going to run out of things to do.
3. You can see a bird in a mass of dough if you WANT to see it :)
We made some stuff with clay in the morning. I made an awful butterfly. She made a bird. I tried to see the bird in what she made, and did. Congratulated her for the effort.
Post lunch, we took a nap.
Then we looked for some information about "lake tahoe" on the net. Have plans of driving there this thanksgiving. Its a difficult terrain, snow can make it more so. We saw videos about snow chains, how to fix them on your car tires. She wanted to see video of how to make a snowman :) Saw those too. Quite educational- for both of us.
I have a chart for her, where we change the date/ weather/ season etc. We went out and checked the weather. Came back and finished the chart. Weather- Sunny, Season- Fall. month- Nov and so on.
Later, i had her do some stuff from a Pre-k workbook. Some of it was-
1. Find triangles in the picture and mark them
2. What comes first - eg. 3 pictures - a child opening an icecream, eating it, and dropping it.
3. connect the dots
4. 4 pictures in a row- find 2 objects that rhyme
5. Cut out shapes from the book and trace them on a paper. Color them.
6. Coloring page - i let her color out of the borders :)
Boy! Did she breeze through the assignments. I gave her a star sticker for each assignment when we were done. Stickers saying- Well done, great job, etc
And then she says, You are a good teacher...i guess kids think their moms know nothing. :) She was surprised that i can connect the dots/ know rhyming words.
We had planned on cleaning-up session as i wrote in the previous post. never got around to it. After our "assignments", we took out the trash, and visited the neighbour who has a baby. An hour flew by. Cleaning up is postponed.
Things i learnt:
1. Little patience goes a long way
2. She is too fast, i am soon going to run out of things to do.
3. You can see a bird in a mass of dough if you WANT to see it :)
We are homeschooling
No, i am not going into the whys and hows.
We start today.
Kid is 4 yr old. She already knows alphabet. Thanks to PBS kids. Sesame street, barney, Super-readers. She absolutely loves her alphabet. Imagining an alphabet in every design. In a restaurant, she takes 3 straws and makes alphabets on the table. I will leave it as it is, for now.
Certainly not making her write. Still have to do some research about teaching left-handers to write. She tries to write some letters, ends up writing their mirror-images at times. Typical left-handed problem. Have to figure out what to do about it.
She loves the picture books we get from the library. I have to read it once to her. Then she makes her own story from the book. Thats the whole idea of the picture book i suppose.
She asks me- Will you teach me like a teacher? I said, No! I'll teach you like a mom. :) Plan to make her a part of some cleaning up. She can get an idea about sorting things. To keep, to give away or to trash. That would be a good practical lesson. Have got some stuff - coloring, stickers, crayons. Will see how she likes those.
We start today.
Kid is 4 yr old. She already knows alphabet. Thanks to PBS kids. Sesame street, barney, Super-readers. She absolutely loves her alphabet. Imagining an alphabet in every design. In a restaurant, she takes 3 straws and makes alphabets on the table. I will leave it as it is, for now.
Certainly not making her write. Still have to do some research about teaching left-handers to write. She tries to write some letters, ends up writing their mirror-images at times. Typical left-handed problem. Have to figure out what to do about it.
She loves the picture books we get from the library. I have to read it once to her. Then she makes her own story from the book. Thats the whole idea of the picture book i suppose.
She asks me- Will you teach me like a teacher? I said, No! I'll teach you like a mom. :) Plan to make her a part of some cleaning up. She can get an idea about sorting things. To keep, to give away or to trash. That would be a good practical lesson. Have got some stuff - coloring, stickers, crayons. Will see how she likes those.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Ek saal baad......
Its the Independence day tomorrow, already the date in India. Last independence day was so different. Passed in a hurry. Endless shopping. Visiting relatives in Pune. Endless phone calls. Endless research online (about life in California :))
It seems just like yesterday. The independence day brings back the memories and also the realisation that we are almost a year old in US.
In fact, this 15th August, we look forward to a short India trip planned for December end. This is nevertheless, the first 15 August i am spending on foreign soil. We are considering putting a tricolour on the car dashboard (if we get it.) Yes, we did have a US flag on the 4th of July. Its now tucked away in the glove box to use on the next 4th July.
It is kind of sad though. Brings back memories of flag hoisting ceremonies in school. The patriotic movies shown on Doordarshan. I remember one independence day, they had shown ROJA. Patriotic songs on chitrahaar and chayageet. More recently, patriotism galore on hundreds of TV channnels. I think they all showed "Border". And of course, the holiday. And no newspaper on 16 August :)
India's independence will be 61 this year. Whether, it was a case of "Aasmaan se gire khajoor pe atke", is a debateable issue. I would rather not go into it.
Happy Independence day!!!
It seems just like yesterday. The independence day brings back the memories and also the realisation that we are almost a year old in US.
In fact, this 15th August, we look forward to a short India trip planned for December end. This is nevertheless, the first 15 August i am spending on foreign soil. We are considering putting a tricolour on the car dashboard (if we get it.) Yes, we did have a US flag on the 4th of July. Its now tucked away in the glove box to use on the next 4th July.
It is kind of sad though. Brings back memories of flag hoisting ceremonies in school. The patriotic movies shown on Doordarshan. I remember one independence day, they had shown ROJA. Patriotic songs on chitrahaar and chayageet. More recently, patriotism galore on hundreds of TV channnels. I think they all showed "Border". And of course, the holiday. And no newspaper on 16 August :)
India's independence will be 61 this year. Whether, it was a case of "Aasmaan se gire khajoor pe atke", is a debateable issue. I would rather not go into it.
Happy Independence day!!!
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Sunset
Sun setting on the Pacific.
Emotional moment. Not for the beauty of it, that's definitely there. But this moment takes me far away, takes me home.
As i see the Sun going down the Pacific, i can see it rising in India. I can almost see the early morning hustle back home. Bro getting ready to catch his 6:23 (or whichever) local, dad done with his pooja and setting out for the mandir, mom starting her day. I am the OWL of the family, so was never a part of this morning hustle and bustle :) But, have felt it around me, during my morning sleep.
And now, i can almost touch that feeling looking at the sunset.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Spare the air
This post from csm inspires me to write about a nice campaign by VTA, the Bus and light-rail authority in Bay area.
They offer free rides on their buses and trains few days in a year.
Following is the excerpt from their website...
“One of the most effective ways residents can help protect public health, the climate, and air quality in the Bay Area is to make everyday clean air choices like riding VTA and driving less,”
“This is a major accomplishment given that not driving for just one day avoids almost one pound of smog-forming pollution and 30 pounds of greenhouse gasses,” said MTC Executive Director Steve Heminger. “As the largest free transit program in the country, the Spare the Air free transit initiative is leading the way in mobilizing residents to slow the effects of climate change.”
This is far from possible in India, I am aware. The initiative taken by VTA is impressive though.
They offer free rides on their buses and trains few days in a year.
Following is the excerpt from their website...
“One of the most effective ways residents can help protect public health, the climate, and air quality in the Bay Area is to make everyday clean air choices like riding VTA and driving less,”
“This is a major accomplishment given that not driving for just one day avoids almost one pound of smog-forming pollution and 30 pounds of greenhouse gasses,” said MTC Executive Director Steve Heminger. “As the largest free transit program in the country, the Spare the Air free transit initiative is leading the way in mobilizing residents to slow the effects of climate change.”
This is far from possible in India, I am aware. The initiative taken by VTA is impressive though.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Birthday
This is the quietest birthday i am having. No, the previous ones were not huge birthday bashes, getting drunk and all..
Its more about the quiet inside me. There was always this anticipation, what surprise gift someone might give, who might call me to wish, feeling bad that certain someone did not remember my birthday even when i remembered his/ her's....You know, those kind of disquieting thoughts.
Its so much better this time. Just one phone call from parents and brother. Phone is quiet, but i do not find it disquieting :) Forgetting birthdates is not an option for anyone anymore. there's Orkut. So, friends could duly write a 'happy birthday' scrap. Good enough. There are many who did not write a scrap/mail...and i have no problems with it...
Could not have had a better birthday.
Happy birthday me....
Its more about the quiet inside me. There was always this anticipation, what surprise gift someone might give, who might call me to wish, feeling bad that certain someone did not remember my birthday even when i remembered his/ her's....You know, those kind of disquieting thoughts.
Its so much better this time. Just one phone call from parents and brother. Phone is quiet, but i do not find it disquieting :) Forgetting birthdates is not an option for anyone anymore. there's Orkut. So, friends could duly write a 'happy birthday' scrap. Good enough. There are many who did not write a scrap/mail...and i have no problems with it...
Could not have had a better birthday.
Happy birthday me....
Sunday, March 02, 2008
Tears for oil
Can a regular errand like Laundry be memorable? It was for me.
Was busy loading the washer in the apartment laundry. Noticed a guy in US army uniform busy at the dryer.
Could not stop chatting up.
Me:"Are you in the army?" (You never know...best confirm)
Soldier: "Yep"
(pause) we both get busy. He starts to leave, and says,
I am leaving today
Where for?
IRAQ (Eye-raak, he says)....
Oh...(i don't know what to say)...finally manage...Is this the first time?
No, Second
Oh...(Again i don't know what to say)....Idiotic question follows...What is it like there?
He shrugs, Its CRAZY, what more can i say?
I am not done yet, more idiotic comments to follow- ...."Its been years now, American people are against it, still the government is adamant on keeping troops in Iraq. "
They want to help. Although, when we had the huge flood down south, nobody helped. No country did.
Hmm....I hope this madness ends soon. and you come back quickly.
He smiles, (but his eyes are brimming with tears). Thats face is imprinted in my memory. Inexplicable.
We say goodbye...SEE YOU SOON.
I come home with a heavy heart. Idiot me, should have asked his apartment number. I can at least go and meet his family while he is away....Never thinking of right things at the right time is an old problem with me. And now there is no way of knowing....
Next day, at the gas station, hubby is complaining about the raise in Petrol prices. from 3.37$/ gallon to 3.48/ gallon.....Hubby's friend chipped in, If not for the troops in Iraq, It will go to 10$/ gallon. May be. I don't understand the politics/ Economics behind it. But what about the tough soldier's eyes brimming with tears? What about them?
Was busy loading the washer in the apartment laundry. Noticed a guy in US army uniform busy at the dryer.
Could not stop chatting up.
Me:"Are you in the army?" (You never know...best confirm)
Soldier: "Yep"
(pause) we both get busy. He starts to leave, and says,
I am leaving today
Where for?
IRAQ (Eye-raak, he says)....
Oh...(i don't know what to say)...finally manage...Is this the first time?
No, Second
Oh...(Again i don't know what to say)....Idiotic question follows...What is it like there?
He shrugs, Its CRAZY, what more can i say?
I am not done yet, more idiotic comments to follow- ...."Its been years now, American people are against it, still the government is adamant on keeping troops in Iraq. "
They want to help. Although, when we had the huge flood down south, nobody helped. No country did.
Hmm....I hope this madness ends soon. and you come back quickly.
He smiles, (but his eyes are brimming with tears). Thats face is imprinted in my memory. Inexplicable.
We say goodbye...SEE YOU SOON.
I come home with a heavy heart. Idiot me, should have asked his apartment number. I can at least go and meet his family while he is away....Never thinking of right things at the right time is an old problem with me. And now there is no way of knowing....
Next day, at the gas station, hubby is complaining about the raise in Petrol prices. from 3.37$/ gallon to 3.48/ gallon.....Hubby's friend chipped in, If not for the troops in Iraq, It will go to 10$/ gallon. May be. I don't understand the politics/ Economics behind it. But what about the tough soldier's eyes brimming with tears? What about them?
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